Tuesday, October 12, 2010

心跳加速

明明就是个爱逗女生的人,
明明就是个爱随便调情的人,
却就是输给了一种感觉,
那种见到了她心跳自然的加速,
心扑通扑通的跳,
整个人紧张的呆着了,
算是因为这种感觉而失败了,
这应该是我人身中最失败的一次,
她的心可有真难攻,
电话号码给了她 她还会问是真的吗,
然后再告诉我她不会随随便便把别人的号码存起来,
都这样了,
难道还不够失败?
算了,
我有耐心!!~

Sunday, October 10, 2010

最近

最近你应该是过的不算太好吧,
都有很多不好的事同时发生吧,
他呢?
在哪里?
他没陪在你身边吗?
不知道,
我只知道我陪不了你,
应该不知道是什么怪癖心理障碍的关系吧,
对不起。

Thursday, October 7, 2010

像我吧??xD

都说处女座另类,双重性格,甚至有点神经质,其实原因只有一个,处女座的一切都要随自己外显的性格而转,姑且称之为'状态'。处女座状态好的时候,可以将自己聪明、细腻、能干、温情、幽默、有内涵等优良品质完全外展,此时他们显得如此完美,光芒四射,并且可以表现得非常外向、健谈,容易与人打成一片(这本非他们的性格)。而一旦处女座状态不好,便会变成另一个人,甚至非常窝囊,一事无成,不过通常此时他们都躲避外在的干扰,所以让人感觉有点间歇性自闭症)因为同为水星守护,所以处女和双子一样善变,但双子善变的是心思,处女善变的却是情绪。    很多时候处女座要面对很多实际的琐事,这时的处女座便不得不在冷中面对周围世界:要么说话做事很不自然,有做作的痕迹;要么便极度冷漠和被动,对谁都不理不睬。其实处女座很清楚自己现在的样子,但他们无力改变和控制自己的情绪,只能选择疯狂地逃避一切。 他们想的是:与其很不自然地面对你,尴尬地和你说些无关痛痒地话,或是因和平时反差太大而被人说成表里不一,性格怪异,还不如先躲一阵子,等调节好了以后再出来。所以,在与人交往中,他们只会和不得不交流的人(实在躲不掉)或是完全陌生的人(反正无所谓)交谈,而和熟悉的朋友反而疏远。 所以.你在他心中地位越重,他躲得你越远。特别是恋人. 而且,大家都知道处女座的人有严重的完美主义倾向,所以就有了所谓的'处女座的人最喜欢若即若离'。原因很简单:他只想给你一个最好最完美的自己,而不愿让你看到他无助脆弱的一面。所以请记住,有时处女座对你冷,绝不是你说错做错什么,这是他们正常的生理现象,他们只是不想让严寒和冰霜伤害了你(可事实上这种做法已经伤害)。不必难过,因为他们在乎你的话,他们的内心比你还要难过、自责和内疚!他们所能做的,只希望快点调整好情绪,回到你的身边。 正基于以上两点,处女座有时便会表现出非常另类的行为和思维模式。他们的性格也很多来源于此:不喜主动,不善交际(也可以热情,只是今天热了,终有一天会冷的),不爱表现,不喜抛头露面(万一哪天情绪无法把握状态不好时,岂不大失脸面),诸如此类。 关于'洁癖'并非处女都有洁癖,很多处女座并不爱干净,但却要求整洁,他们更多的是井然有序,不喜欢别人破坏他们所整理和布置的'完美'格局。处女座更多的是有精神洁癖。一旦触碰到他们精神上的禁区,严重时会表现得歇斯底里。 关于'花心'一般说来处女座绝不花心,忠诚是他们的代名词。异性关系多很可能是他们需要确定一个好人缘和自己有魅力,来反击那些普遍观点。一旦找到心中真爱,他会呵护你一辈子,只要你能给他安全感,他永不背叛,心中眼中唯你一人。寻花问柳,红杏出墙这些事与他们绝缘(一是责任感所致,二是怕麻烦)。 关于'聪明'不似双子灵活机巧,不象水瓶创意非凡,也不是天蝎的那种计画周密,处女座更多体现的是智慧。细腻、理性、好学加上十二星座里一流的洞察力和最强的逻辑思维能力,处女座想不聪明都难。没事少在处女座面前信口开河,随意撒谎,很多伪纱他们一眼便能看透;也别跟他们玩什么心计,你玩不过他们的。处女是那种可以把你卖了你还得向他道谢的类型。没事也少跟处女座辩论,他们没理也可找出理,甚至找出不止一条理来。处女是永远不会吃亏的。 关于'单纯'处女座很纯真,但绝不单纯,他们内心复杂得让人难以想象,很多不经意的事可能都是他们精心布置的。处女座也总在纯洁和好色之间徘徊,这一点最难说清。不过他们真正的内心是极其善良的, 宁可自己苦也不愿伤害任何人,心灵如水晶一般晶莹剔透。 关于'幽默'都说处女座冷若冰霜,缺乏幽默。多和他们接触吧,你会体会到什么是冷幽默,什么是真正的幽默,而并非品位低俗的搞笑。 关于'迟钝'别看你和处女座说某些提议时他们半天才反应过来,在你说好的一瞬间,他们脑子里可能已经转过五六个你这项提议会造成的后果(通常是消极后果)了。他们总是想得太多,绝非想得太慢。 关于'自私'处女座的自私觉不是狮子的那种惟我独尊,也不是水瓶的以自我为中心。处女座正因为是无私的,所以显得自私。(能够理解吗?)因为处女不想伤害任何人。 关于'逃避'由于处女座性格上的因素,他们通常会显得压力很大。当周遭的事物已无法掌控,或是自己的情绪无法调节好时,他们会疯狂地逃避,堕落自己,这种状况通常对别人无害,却是伤害自己,让所有爱他们的人感到心碎。不过不用太担心,过一阵子他们自己会好的,他们天性的自我批判精神很快便会起作用。处女座一般不会彻底堕落,堕落前可能都已留有余地,只是在等待着希望的来临。甚至有时堕落都是做给别人看的。 关于'内涵'处女座有涵养这一点是肯定的。在成长中不断吸取教训,不断学习,取人之长来丰富自己的内涵。因为他们感觉到情绪无法把握,而这些是自己可以踏踏实实做到的,将来一定有帮助。这是他们所追求的完美主义目标。 处女座就是一个表面神秘到难以琢磨,说穿了却又很简单的星座。最接近神的人?可能吧,处女座喜欢这样 来标榜自己。因为他们确实有超凡脱俗的一面。他们的内心接近了神,可是身在这个世界,不能不食人间烟火吧,所以必须得戴着一个面具活在这个世界上。 处女座喜欢和人说些暧昧的话,对心仪的对象却不好意思表白。 处女座希望别人了解自己,却又只将能公布的那一部分对外展示。 处女座是最有责任感的人了,可很多时候却害怕承担责任。

9/17-樂於行善,慈悲為懷,有同情心,樂於幫助永求助之人,可能導致本意之外的浪費,喜愛受阿諛,容易為居心不良的朋友或同事所利用,可能有些自負,要提防虛情假意的朋友。

謙虛、喜歡整潔、處事小心、頭腦清晰而分析能力強、能明辨是非。

喜歡雞蛋裡挑骨頭、要求太高以致吹毛求疵、多愁善感、小題大作、古板、難以取悅。

无聊

最近因为都感觉很无聊,
所以不知不觉的读起了关于星座的东西,
算是想了解下自己,
发现星座分析蛮准的,
处女座的分析蛮像我,
不管是个性 要求 等 都蛮像的,
我应该就是90%正版的处女座吧xD。

Copy Paste

Suddenly feel like not playing facebook anymore...
The reason should be facebook mean nothing to me...
Just a boring website page which entertain me during my free time...
Or because of the reason which i know i will get hurt every once i step in his profile...
Not because of jealously Not because of childish...
Is just because i start to know that I'm getting disappear in your eyes sight...
Even i less using phone too...
It is meaningless holding a phone that won't ring...
Maybe my phone will ring...
But the ringing is not from u...

Actually can i ask...
Do i really fall for you...
This question is spinning on my mind...
Are you that important to me...
In the other hand...
Am I'm important in your heart...
Do you care what i write...
Do you care what my feels...
This answer has been hide deep inside the darkness...
Which i cant even find a light to get through it...

Today i read a comic book title was
" I'm here "
The story is about a girl which not get notice by anyone...
She always stay in a corner, never speaker to classmate...
But she change when the boy notice her...
I wonder do u ever notice me...
I did asked u before this question...
& you also answer me...

I really wonder what type of boy you are...
Love to flirt around with pretty girls...
Or you are just a playboy that fooling me around...
But my feeling told me you were special...
Special enough till let me grow up once more again...
Yeaps for real you have a good looking...
You were rich...
You have the brain...
I can't confirm that i could tie your heart well...
Because there is much more girls outside waiting for U...
& have been prove I just let u go...
Is my fault...
Because I'm not that brave enough...

I'm just hiding all the way...
Not even be brave to speak out what i thinks...
Even you were just the same...
Never which to tell me the truth of your thinking...
Maybe for you that is not important...
Because you haven which to face the reality in this world...
Or maybe you did face the problem i had before...
That is why our thinking were totally different...
But the reason you liked me is what...
Is just because of my thinking...
& I'm sorry for failing it...
Make you disappoint Make myself hurt...
It all made by my barely hand...


Do you know every night when you have a nice sleep...
I'm totally different from U...
Looking at your picture...
My tears will drop...
Unlike U...
I'm not that famous as u...
And you did even try to stand at my side to think about me...
Please understand i'm not as strong as u are...
I'm not that confident as u were...
I have many black shadow around me which i can't even let go...
Yeaps i maybe different from other girl...
But please remember I'm also weaker than other girl...
I never blame anything...
Just blame that human love to lie people...
Human love to think of themselves only...

For the last
I really hope that we can have a nice chat
before we will regret
I dun mind after the chat we r not friend
I just care that at least we were true friend before
We know what each other thinking
But this hope never will happen
I promise


I never forget what you say before
It is not easy for me to fall in love with girls

For my case:
[----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------]

Copied this post from someone's blog,
I agree with this blog very much,
maybe it is because this is what i feel.

The reason i deleted her from facebook is because i am afraid,
I am afraid to see anything,
maybe because i am not there anymore,
perhaps i never have been.

I don't place my phone near me anymore,
I silent my phone whenever i have it with me,
I thought of turning it off every night,
it is because i hate the fact that there is no more her.
Even if there is her,
I dunno how to face her,
I only think of avoiding.

Every night while she is sleeping tightly or maybe having a phone call,
where am I?? Alone.
what am I doing?? Think of her.
and without fail,
tears again.

What a big joke,
the Matthew who either is always cool, flirty or has temper will become someone who cries terribly at night,
I admit,
I am someone who cries whenever I feel sad,
whenever I feel hurt,
I even cry at other peoples' story,
because I feel them.

I dun care whether I laugh or not,
i just know tat i haven smile for a long time,
for quite some time,
the onli moment where i would smile is when i am crying,
every time i cry i would force a smile,
i guess that smile is what i try to do to stop me crying,
but i end up crying more,
why?

One of my new friend taught me the onli way to forget a past is to face it,
too bad that i cant find the strength to do so,
i dun have the courage,
i wan to avoid her in any possible way,
because i dunno how to face her anymore,
I wish that no one would ever mention her,
the onli place i want her to be is onli in my memories.

I know how to give advise to anyone i think who needs,
but why cant i take my owns?
I always tell others to smile and move on,
why am i not doing it?
why do i miss her so badly that tears flow?

I miss her a lot,
i wan to keep it to myself,
if someone ever ask me,
do you miss her?
I would lie and say that i dont,
but in my heart i miss her badly.

Monday, October 4, 2010

心情101

今天感觉超high的,
不管语言或动作都超轻松的,
感觉好好,
如果每时每刻都能维持这样多好,
可是我却有些不详的预感,
好像有什么是要发生了,
算是有些担心。

今天我表哥有告诉我他看到我和女朋友在一起了,
还叫我明年新年带她回家让阿嬷看,
糟糕,
要我去哪里找个女朋友给他看?
还要愿意赌博,
还要会演福建电视剧的,
哈哈,
要去哪里挖哦?

耳洞打了快要两个月了,
家人却没发现,
我的家人是不是超赞的?
算了,
这不是重点,
我想说的是关于我班上同学的,
看来要到来的观音旦后,
我班上7788的男生都会有耳洞了,
哈哈,
看来多多少少我都影响了他们 =p。

Saturday, October 2, 2010

公平

应该是因为还会流泪,
所以对于你,
我还算是不忍心,
想起你问的问题,
想起你提起我所做的承诺,
我觉得我并没那么忍心,
或许是我心软,
我曾经给你24小时,
算是因为我想公平,
这次我再个你24小时,
随时让你领取,
这24小时让你问你想问的问题,
让你得到对于我一举一动的澄清,
还有之类的,
我不会有半句谎言,
不会隐瞒任何事,
也许你会觉得这24小时是多余的吧,
随便你怎么想,
慢慢考虑其他的细节吧,
想领取这24小时时,
你自然有方法找到我。

Friday, October 1, 2010

空间

我真的不知道你想怎样,
连我最私人的空间你都会想夺走,
随你,
你喜欢怎样就怎样吧,
我不想管了,
最多我再也不写部落格。

有些事你看了会觉得伤心,
因为你觉得你又被别人说了,
你觉得我变了,
算了,
我不想澄清了,
我很累了,
我还是会不知不觉地流泪,
算了,
不管。